Biarlah....

Honestly, aku takde mood nak update on this blog..My emotions so unstable.. I tak penah rasa sedih, unwanted & ignored macam ni.. aku rasa everything yg aku buat atau cakap sekarang semua tak kena..I have to be carefull with what I said which is sooooo not me...I mean bila nak ckp something even simple thing aku kena pikir dulu " betul ke aku ckp ni..tak terasa ke dia nanti". Paling worst sekali kena susun ayat so dia tak misunderstanding ape yg aku cakap..

   However, untuk tak layan sgt kan perasaan the only thing yg aku boleh buat masa ni just pray to Allah untuk buang perasaan marah, benci & tak sabar yg makin teruk. Setiap hari, aku akan berdoa supaya Allah tenangkan jiwa yg kacau ni..Selagi ape yg tersimpan dlm hati ni selagi tu la aku rasa something yg jadi belakang aku tapi aku tak tau & someone hiding something from me!! 
Macam mana blh jadi camni?? Aku sendiri pun tak tau..it just happen...

  Ape yg aku dpt rasa perasaan tu makin jauh..hati makin sakit...sefahaman tu makin kurang...& intimacy tu dah takde.. Aku tak tau mana silapnya..selalu org kata kita kena muhasabah diri sebelum salahkan org lain..& tu la aku pikir tiap2 hari kadang2 smpi tak blh tido...I know I'm not perfect not everyone in this world is perfect tp kalo dulu dia boleh terima aku seadanya kenapa tak sekarang? Kenapa baru sekarang nampak kekurangannya? Sebab tu aku percaya "hati & perasaan manusia boleh berubah" tp antara kita perasaan atau tak je..

  Hati sedih pikirkan..dulu kemesraan tu nampak, boleh bergurau..tp sekarang...biarlah Allah je yg tau.. :(  sometimes aku rasa give up dgn perasaan camni sebab yg sakit diri sendiri bukan org lain..The worst part is I can be myself anymore... :( We can talk or discuss what we felt to each other mybe he too busy to think all this & mybe he think I just made up all this to get attention..yes FYI I'm lack of attention from the person who used to be my soulmate & my bestfriend..


   Therefore, to make it getting worst I just pray to Allah give me strength, patience coz I believe I can fly..(tiba2..hehe just kidding) coz I believe Allah had better plan for me in the future & what happen now there must be a reasons... 

"Love iz like a puzzle. When you are in love, all the pieces fit but when your heart gets broken, it takes a while to get every thing back together. "

Well..that's all for now..see ya soon...


   

Happiness....

Today Gibb just 5 months old..I'm so excited coz next month i can give his first meal..yeah!! Can't believe it he grown up now.. feels like just yesterday I gave birth to him..
  
   Now he learned to crawling..his sister Liqa learn how to speak it so funny the words she said.."ba" means bye.. "mmmi" means ummi..& many words I can't describe here. Everyday is learning process for me to understand her. The funny part when I don't understand her she will crying..hahaaa..even louder when I laugh it loud..

  Another good news is Liqa getting better & her appettite is AWESOME!! She want to eat no matter what the foods is. Most importantly, she eat rice without forcing..alhamdullilah...I think the improvement is because I cut down her milk intake by give her 3-4 times daily..

  The best part of all, Gibb know how to play with Liqa..what ever his sister do he will laughing like someone tickle him..so damn cute..it the best moment I ever had when I saw both of them play together. I think every parents feel that way too... I didn't know how it's gonna be when Gibb can walk & Liqa getting more naughty..what happen to me? how I'm taking care of them by my own? Can I cope alone? Arggh..!! Too many question on my mind..


   Well, I gotta go..see ya soon..

  

   

My babies on fever...

    Alhamdullilah, Liqa getting better now after 3 days been on fever. However, my "nursing" role continue again coz now Gib on fever.Luckily, I can detect his fever earlier. 

    I'm also feeling unwell & might be on fever as my throat so painful to swallow. It one of signs that I'll get fever. Anyway, I don't mind at all if I'm sick as long my kids not sick. I think all parents think same way like me..

   Kali ni, Liqa demam teruk sangat sampai muntah-muntah & diarrhea at same time. Kesian dia..dah la badan baru nak naik, baru ade selera nak makan sekali demam pulak. Berat badan dia turun mendadak & on 1st day dia kena diarehia nampak sangat muka dia sakit & mata dia cengkung..my mom pernah cakap kalo nak tau baby lost banyak air bile kena diarehia tengok mata dia cengkung ke tak. Bila dia camtu I dah takut so I bawak dia to Klinik Ikhwan nearby to my house. Sampai kat klinik tu, org ramai ok la boleh tunggu maybe ade nak amik ubat..after 1/2 hour waiting, only doctor meet us. I explained everything to the doctor what's wrong with her..he checked her chest & that's it. Lepas tu, I thought maybe dia nak check lagi ke or advise me don't give her this & that..you know what he said "ok..tu saja" i was like "tu je?" punya la lama tunggu..tak sampai 10 mnt je dia jmpe..??(ckp dlm hati) Rasa cam orang buta pun boleh buat camni..pegang-pegang sikit then bagi ubat..

    Next day, I bagi Liqa medicine yg "doctor mcm bgs 2" bagi..but still no improvement. Liqa still muntah2 n diarrhea..I'm afraid she getting worst so I informed my hubby to back home early. When my imaginaton so high..I have the "movie scene" what if..she admitted to hospital how bout gib..whose gonna take care of liqa..a lot of "worst case scenario" action in my mind..So, we went to Pusrawi Clinic (knownly as Pusrawi Hospital now they moved to Jln Ampang). I felt so relieved when doctor said "she is fine..still ade air dlm badan dia".He advised me don't gave any formula milk yet to stop the diarrhea. Replace it with ribena or milo. 


    Luckily, she want drink ribena..before this she never take any drinks other than her formula milk..Sekarang, baru dia nak main, makan sikit & kurang menangis..aaahh...I feel bit relief..bila dia dah makin sihat..



Well, only this for now. See ya soon.

Cooking?? so not me...LOL!!

Let me be honest...so far in my marriage life this 2 years++ I NEVER cooking seriously..I only cooked simple things example ; spagethi, fried rice (just learn from my hubby). Unfortunetly, my hubby so fussy bout foods he rather his mom cooked or sometimes he cooked himself..
    
  Nak dijadikan cerita..last week I kena test dgn my mother in law..Dia tanya " kalau nak goreng ayam tu ade dlm fridge goreng la.. I was like "huh? kena masak sendiri ke?" kata dlm hati je..then I answer "ooww..okay" nasib baik la time tu ,y hubby on the way balik rumah so I tunggu dia balik smbl tu busy kan diri buat benda lain..Excitednya bile my hubby balik I bisik kat hubby "mak soh goreng ayam..camna..org takut minyak..(org tu I la) tolong b.." dengan senyum & cool dia jawab "okay..tp kena tengok camna b buat.." so dia pun masakkan la..nama pun soh tengokkan memang I tengok je la..hehehee...

  Well, now I realized nothing to be proud of I you dont know how to cook..hehee..mula-mula kahwin memang ade nak belajar masak..tp tolong je la kan..then lama2 bile krj mmg tak dpt tolong la..n now full time housewife suka ke tak kena la belajar ade jgk tapi bile nk belajar sape nk tengokkan my kids yg nakal ni...dilema lagi..hmmm...

   I ingat lagi masa I single.. my mom said "camna ko nak kahwin kalo masak pun x pernah.." well I proved to my mom even dah married pun I still tak tau masak..hahaaa..Even my hubby pun tanya bile nak belajar masak then I ckp bile dok umah sendiri..then dia tny "kenapa?" I ckp la "sb suka ke tak still kena masak beside your mom masak kan lg sedap dari I so enjoy the moment while you have now..." hehehee

   I bukan tak nak masak it's just not my passion..my passion is EATING..hahaa..I think cooking is too complicated..especially malay foods.. that's why I perefer western foods.. ( alasan sangat kan..haha) & I tak suka bile minyak masak "pop" ( meletup2) sakit tau..haha..

  Jangan ingat I tak suka masak langsung..I nak jugak cuba baked cake..because I loveeeee so much cake...tp tak de  budget lagi nak beli barang2 tuk baked cake & tak de masa nk pergi class pun..mmm...anyway, I'll update here if I cooking my first meal my favourite..ayam masak kicap..haha


Well..that's all for now. See ya soon... 

Penang...I'll come back!!

Helloooo...such a busy month for me..last week my family went to Penang for vacation & this is 1st time we went to vacation (we means me & my hubby & kids & my parents & siblings) We went there by a car & it's been long journey..& I dont feel tired at all ( coz I have a driver, my brother amad).  

Liqa & me view from our hotel room

    Kami tinggal di Bayview Beach hotel (next to Hardrock Hotel). Masa mula2 sampai biase la rehatkan diri dulu then mlm kami pergi dinner dekat tepi pantai...(awww....best giler..luckily tak hujan masa tu) tp I hanya sempat makan sekejap je tak dpt nikmati betul2 lauk yg my mom order sebab biasa la  liqa tak boleh duduk diam..& gibby pulak nangis.. ( tp cam2 la bile ade anak kecik..ceh nak sedapkan ati sendiri)..Amad planned nak bawak kami ke night market tp nasib tak baik sebab ujan.. :( so kami jalan2 naik keta maybe bila dah on the way blk ujan berhenti tp tak..end up my hubby & my bros (amad & kiki) pegi jalan2..(menci tau..) & I with my parents & kids stay in hotel room  :(  

My hubby & Kids tepi beach on dinner time

   Next morning we wake up early for buffet breakfeast.. awww..such a yummy breakfeast & too many to choose end up hubby ate nasi lemak (yg masam) & I toast bread with half boiled egg ( very da mat salleh)..after breakky we went  to shopping mall (Gurney Plaza) my mom tiba-tiba nak shopping pulak. Ok la lebih kurang macam 1 utama..again..kami berpecah...my mom pegi shopping barang dia..my dad with my bros..& us..busy with the kids (my hubby change nappy for liqa & I'm breastfeed Gib).Ingat sempat la nak kenyit2 mata dgn my mom belanjer something..mmm tak dpt..yg dpt baju tidur gibby...hahaa

  Disebabkan my kids kepenatan & my dad pun sakit kaki (kesian dia..) kami pun balik lepas lunch..& amad bawak kami ke Tanjung...(arrgh..tak ingat tanjung ape) konon nak beli mee sotong yg dia bangga2kan tu..& ABC sekali tak kesampaian sebab long Q..


  Pukul 6.30pm kami sampai kat hotel..& rehatkan diri...malam ke-2 ni kami tak pegi mane2 sbb my parents penat..so amad & my hubby tapau je nasi kandar & we slept at 1am..cant wait for next morning breakfeast..

  as usual after subuh prayer we went to buffet breakfeast but not much as yesterday so i just took croisant..after that me & my hubby pegi baby pool & tengok liqa 1st time mandi kat pool she so happy dengan swimming suit dia..she look adorable..last pit stop we went to the beach.. & the funny is liqa takut ombak..menjerit2 dia "na..nak..naa nak..(tak nak) so my hubby la dokong dia

Hubby & Gib atas ferry

 On the way nak blk kami naik ferry...excited nya tp i x blh keluar sebab liqa tido..it takes 1/2 hour from island to tnh besar...so balik KL trerus...bye2 penang..

 What makes me want come back to penang is a lot of heritage & history places that we dont have time to visits..

Welcome 2013!!!!

I hope it's not to late for me wishing Happy New year to all who view my blog. As usual there is no celebration for me & my family! All we did just enjoyed the fireworks from home (we can see the KLCC tower from our home as we stayed at 2nd floor). It seems like at KLCC their fireworks not happening like 2012 new year celebration. 

  On a day of new year we went to Zoo negara! We had fun because we picnic there & take a lot of pictures even though we so tired to the max..!! I'll post the picture once I edit it..heheee

  

 Well, I got to go..see ya soon!!